the beauty of surrendering sin

Where do you meet God? Some meet Him at the mountain tops, and others in the deepest valleys. Some go to beautiful churches, others go to their closets,. Some go to the city, others go the country. Some go the beach, others go the woods.

Psalm 139:7-10

Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.

Although we can experience God’s presence in all aspects and places life, He usually meets me in the woods.This is one reason why I am starting to fall in love with Clermont and the Oise. There are miles of trails to explore and forests to discover!

 I’m not sure exactly what it is or why He chooses to meet me in the woods. But I have always felt most aware of God’s presence and voice in the woods. Maybe its the crunching of leaves beneath my feet or the towering of trees above my head. Maybe it is the song of praises by the birds or the mysterious movements in the bushes. Maybe its because as a child I would spend hours exploring and discovering the woods. Maybe it is the simplicity of meeting the Creator in His creation. On this particular adventure into the woods I wondered where I should stop and rest. As I walked and sang my prayer “Where can I see your presence? I want to see your presence!” a tree began to glow orange in front of me. At first glance I thought it was the sun shining down on it but as I looked closer I realized that the sun was shining in the other direction. My heart lept as I prayed “God is this the spot? Are you going to meet me here as the I AM meet Moses at the burning bush?” This was the spot. The tree was beautiful and mature. The blanket of orange on the trunk was some kind of fungus but no other trees looked like this one. crunchy small leaves filled the large clearing, along with an abandoned bonfire pit, fallen trees, and my wonder of how was God going to make this a special place for me.

I sat on the fallen tree trunk and began to look around and wait for the Lord to speak to me. Then I had this nudge to go lie in the center of the clearing. Of course I had thought this a bit silly and I did not want to get dirty, but I brought a sweetshirt and I knew I could at least lay my head on that. So I layed myself below the trees as they grew in splender above me. Their branches leading to the skys.

As I lay beneath their beauty and life, I thought about their roots below me. So strong. So solid. I marveled as the sun glissened on the leaves far above me. A life rooted in Christ is a life strong, full, beautiful. It glissens and reflects His love.

And then I pondered the fact that I was surrounded by the death of these trees. All the dead leaves and branches that make up the forest floor had become my bed. What dead leaves (sin) must fall from my life?

Psalm 139:23-24

Search me, God, and know my heart;
    test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting.

I began to notice as the dead leaves would dance to the ground. One after another. Isn’t death and surrendering of sin suppose to be hard and ugly? but these leaves are a thing of beauty as they swirl to the floor below. “Lord what are trying to show me?” And then he whispered, “Letting go of sin doesn’t have to be hard and ugly. If you trust me by surrendering your sin, your evil ways to me, your burdens, then they will fall to the ground in a peaceful and beautiful way. “

Proverbs 3:5

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding

I spent some time discovering my sins and I quickly realized that they are sins I have surrendered in the past. The dead leaves are so beautifully fallying without ease and yet I do not understand how my sin could be like these leaves. I didn’t see any dead leaves falling up into the tree. So why is my life full of leaves that have already fallen? Why do I keep on sinning?

Romans 7:15

 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.

And then I was quickly reminded of seasons. In the spring the tree bursts full of life, in the summer it grows and produces new life, in the fall it sheds what is dead, and in the winter it rests. It is a cycle. The Lord is telling me that although my sinful self is dead (Romans 6) there is still seasons change. There will be times of growth and times of loss. On this day I walked out from the woods excited as I once agained find myself in a place of surrend and trust. Today surrendering my sin was an act of worship and beauty to my Father.

I would love to hear where you meet God and what He has revealed to you lately!